Dictionary of Terms

Chapter FIVE
HOW TO IDENTIFY WHERE A DRIVER IS FROM

1. One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: Montreal
   
   

2. One hand on wheel, one finger out window: Toronto
   
   

3. One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic: Ottawa
   
   

4. One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator: Boston
   
   

5. One hand on wheel, one hand on nonfat double decaf cappuccino, cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator, gun on lap: Los Angeles
   
   

6. Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror: Saskatoon, but driving in Toronto
   
   

7. Both hands in air, gesturing, both feet on accelerator, head turned to talk to someone in the back seat: Quebec
   
   

8. One hand on 12 oz. double shot latte, one knee on wheel, cradling cell phone, foot on brake, mind on radio game, banging head on steering wheel while stuck in traffic: Vancouver
   
   

9. One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating between both feet being on the brake and both feet on the accelerator, throwing McDonalds bag out the window: Red Deer
   
   

10. Four wheel drive pick-up truck, shotgun mounted in rear window, beer cans on the floor, raccoon tails attached to the antenna: Prince George
    
    

11. Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above windshield, driving 40 km on Hwy 1 in the left lane with the left blinker on: Victoria......SO TRUE!!!!!

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